Why you shouldn’t let your guard down around the male feminist.
Why Can’t You Trust a Male Feminist?
Sounds perfect, right?
He’s hot, he’s got a lot going for him AND he cares about women!
Maybe he’ll really understand you …
Maybe he’ll treat you better than all the other guys treated you …
We explain why you shouldn’t let your guard down around the male feminist.
He’s a Feminist When It Suits Him.
Hugh Hefner has actually been called a feminist. That’s right. The man who reduced women to sex objects for DECADES. He’s been called a pioneer of women’s sexual liberation, abortion and reproductive rights.
It’s true that these are important aspects of feminism, but they are also the aspects that BENEFIT MEN! Of course Hugh Hefner supported reproductive rights, otherwise he’d have had hundreds of children he’d need to pay for.
Of course Hugh Hefner supported women’s sexual liberation, otherwise how would he have made money off of us?
If you want to know how Hefner treated the women in his life, Holly Madison’s biography is a must-read. She details how his overbearing control lead to her contemplating suicide.
When she became an official girlfriend, Hefner offered Holly a Quaalude (a sedative) and said “in the ’70s they used to call these pills ‘thigh openers.'”
Thanks Hef! You’ve done so much for us!
Choice Feminism is His Best Friend.
“It’s a woman’s choice to do what she wants with her body!” is the battlecry of male feminists all over the world.
Male feminist logic: “Women CHOOSE to be slapped in porn, therefore I can watch it without feeling guilty. I’m a great guy.”
Choice feminists argue that women are capable of making their own decisions. It’s actually sexist to imply that they can’t choose for themselves! In reality, this is just a convenient way of ignoring how many sex workers start off underage, and the patriarchal socialisation which forces these ‘choices’ upon us.
The male feminist will use choice feminism as an excuse to shut down any concerns you might have about his online (and offline) pursuits. He might even add that it’s a privilege that women can sell their bodies in this way. It’s actually exploitation of men!
Female Empowerment Means Sleeping With Him.
Ah, that women’s sexual liberation … how’s that working out for you?
Of course, it’s great not to be slut-shamed anymore. Oh, wait, but we are! It’s just that now we’re supposed to take it as a compliment. Empowering.
BONUS if he tells you that you can totally be submissive and a feminist!
He Wants to Split the Check.
“Women are independent ladies and no longer need to have dinner bought for them. It’s actually sexist towards women to pay for the date I asked her on!”
Would be nice if that equality filtered into housework and childcare which women still take the brunt of even when earning the same or higher than their partners …
But it’s not just dinner. He’ll also want you to make the first move and be the one to text him first. He’ll call it ‘taking charge’ but really he’s just manipulating you into doing all the work in the relationship.
Equal Rights, Equal Lefts.
OK, this equal rights, equal lefts (or equal rights, equal fights) is EVERYWHERE. It is all over the internet.
There is a significant subsection of the male population who are waiting with gleeful anticipation for a woman to hit him so that he can hit her back in the name of ‘equality’.
It would be patronising not to hit her back, right?
He’s a Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing.
There are plenty of men who will literally just pretend to be someone else to get you into bed.
If a man tells you he’s a feminist, don’t just take his word for it. Be on the lookout for behaviour that doesn’t quite match up. And remember, his definition might be very different to yours.
Don’t put it past a man to pretend he’s a feminist to lull you into a false sense of security. It’s easier for men to sleep with women they’ve made feel safe. Don’t fall for it.
He Mansplains Feminism to You.
This is an annoyance you don’t need in your life.
Feminist men like to explain sexism to women as though they could ever really understand the female experience. Don’t bother giving your own opinion. He won’t listen.
Or he might just enjoy irritating you by playing devil’s advocate.
Of course, we welcome male allies. More men who are on our side can only be a good thing.
But be wary of men who wear feminism like a badge of honour. He’s got a reward in mind and that reward is in between your legs.